Review: I’m Taking My Eggs and Going Home: How One Woman Dared to Say No to Motherhood by Lisa Manterfield
Author: Lisa Manterfield
Title: I’m Taking My Eggs and Going Home: How One Woman Dared to Say No to Motherhood
Release: January 4th 2011
Reviewer: Steph (Eowyn)
Source: Personal Library
Purchase: | Book Depository
Lisa Manterfield was a sensible 32-year-old when she met The One—a man who sparked a passion for tango, an urge to break down closed doors, and a deep-rooted desire to reproduce. Five years later she was a baby addict, hiding her addiction, plotting a maternity ward heist, and threatening anything that got in her way, including her beloved husband and his pesky practicality.
In this gritty and honest memoir, Manterfield traces her spiraling route from rational 21st century woman to desperate mama-wannabe. She examines the siren song of motherhood, the insidious lure of the fertility industry, and the repercussions of being childless in a mom-centric society. But this isn’t just another infertility story with another miracle baby ending, nor is it a sad introspective of a childless woman; this is a story about love, desire, and choices—and ultimately about hope. It is the story of a woman who escapes her addiction, not with a baby, but with her sanity, her marriage, and her sense-of-self intact.
I picked up I’M TAKING MY EGGS AND GOING HOME by Lisa Manterfield a few months ago as I was beginning to let the reality sink in that IUI might not be my happily ever after as I had hoped. I had begun the progression of realizing just how miserable the hormones were making me feel and deciding that I didn’t want to continue with IVF and even more hormones for the slim chances my Dr. had given me last summer. I looked around and it seemed no one wanted to talk about what it meant to come through infertility treatments childfree and then I found Manterfield’s book.
Two months later and hormone free I can begin to tell you a little about this wonderful book. If you are at the place I am where you are considering stopping and living child free you are in the process of discovering that nobody talks about this outcome. It’s as if they are afraid but where do I go from here? How do I move forward into unknown and new realities and dreams? Manterfield has faced this moment and is willing to talk candidly with us about it.
Her memoir is full of emotion and honesty. She tells us about the crazy ideas she has during her infertility struggle and what it feels like to wake up one day and realize you don’t want to do this anymore. She delves into what it feels like to live in a mommy centric world when you can’t get pregnant. She is open with her struggle with whether or not to adopt or try IVF and I found myself in many of her struggles. One particularly stands out as she describes the lure of hope with an acupuncturist when she almost jumps full force back on the roller coaster after deciding to stop. Manterfield does an excellent job of showing how you begin to lose yourself along the way and the strength it takes to say enough. It is so easy to jump back on.
I thoroughly enjoyed I’M TAKING MY EGGS AND GOING HOME. There are so many emotions wrapped into the decision to stop and say no to the infertility industry. Others don’t understand and I think some are just afraid because if you don’t walk away with a bundle of joy at the end then it means they may not either. When you have reached the end of your rope Manterfield’s story will help you begin to explore what now? Where do I go from here and help you come to terms with the fact that your life is wonderful just the way it is and you should be living it. This option may not be for everyone but for those of you thinking of stopping treatment and living a childfree life her words will be invaluable. Lisa Manterfield, has dared to show us that we can still live a rewarding life even if it’s to be child free.