Zombie Week! Guest Blog and Giveaway: Beauty Dates the Beast by Jessica Sims (Jill Myles)
Ready for the Undead
Every household has a dirty secret or two. Some keep their money in a coffee-can. Maybe there’s a family pet buried in the back yard because someone stepped on it. Maybe there’s a hidden room in the basement. My husband and I are no different than every other family – we have a shameful, dirty secret: we are constantly preparing for a zombie apocalypse.
No lie! It’s something we’re both fascinated with – zombie movies and the impending apocalypse. We have analyzed movie after movie, assessing and discussing the escape plans of characters. This is one reason why we both cannot stand The Walking Dead TV show. Those people have a piss-poor survival plan. If there are hordes of zombies, everyone should carry a weapon. Don’t wander off. Don’t fire guns. Don’t wander off into the forest alone, for heaven’s sake. Practice shooting. Learn to clean your own damn gun. Everything about that show drives us crazy, and it all boils down to the fact that their survival instinct sucks.
We’ve thought long and hard about the best, most defensible places for a zombie apocalypse. The places to avoid. The streets we’d take to get out of the city and where we’d head from there. We have extra food and water in the house. Weapons. Battery powered radios and extra books. Extra blankets. Extra toilet paper and cat food. Extra duct tape – cause you never know when you’re going to need duct tape, really.
Our love of zombie movies has prepared us, too. Dawn of the Dead taught us that a mall? Defensible. A gun store? Awesome except on the food front. Islands? Bad idea. Zombies of Mass Destruction taught us that in case of an emergency, crazy rednecks always have guns. Shaun of the Dead taught us that when in doubt, a good zombie shuffle can fool the ravening masses and a cricket bat is an awesome weapon. Survival of the Dead taught us that zombies like to ride horses and George Romero really needs to stop making movies (sorry George).
I realize this is a weird scenario to plot out, and we truly don’t anticipate a zombie apocalypse. Not really. But it’s fun to plan out such a thing, and to discuss strategy. What would you do if your neighbors started rising from the dead and attacking? Well, apparently you can come to our house (I’m kidding, I’m kidding…actually, I’m not. We only have emergency supplies for two).
Jessica Sims lives in Texas. She hates writing a bio, so something cool will undoubtedly go here later when she actually thinks of something interesting to write. She has some cats, but what writer doesn’t? She plays video games and confesses to reading comic books. And she likes writing, but that one was pretty obvious.
Jessica Sims is represented by Holly Root at the Waxman Literary Agency. For business information about rights or anything else, please contact Holly Root. – Website
Due for release October 25, 2011
WANTED
Single human female to join charming, wealthy single male were-cougar for a night of romantic fun – and maybe more.
Me: The tall, sensuous, open-minded leader of my clan.
You: A deliciously curvy virgin who’s intimately familiar with what goes bump in the night. Must not be afraid of a little tail. Prefer a woman who’s open to exploring her animal nature. Interest in nighttime walks through the woods a plus.
My turn-ons include protecting you from the worst the supernatural world has to offer.
Ready for an adventure? Give me a call.
Vampires and doppelgangers need not apply.
Also check out this exciting Zombie-licious fun by Jessica’s alter ego – Jill Myles!
“These stories are available completely free on my website under the ‘Free Short Stories’ tab. If you’re wanting a copy for your Nook or Kindle or Ipad, they’re also available on Smashwords and other online retailers for a nominal fee.” – Jill Myles
Collected here are 7 short, slightly twisted fairy tales retold from a zombie perspective. What if Cinderella had been undead when she went to the ball? What if Little Red Riding Hood went to Grandma’s house to eat her?
Included here are:
Beauty & The Zom-Beast | Zombie Cinderella | Rapunzombel | The Princess and the Zomb-Pea | Little Red Rotting Hood | Moldy-locks and the Three Bears | Sleeping Zom-Beauty
Oh, Beauty Dates the Beast sounds very good. Adding it to my TBR list right now!
Now this sounds like a sexy little romp of a book ;) and the cover is drool worthy. Thanks for the chance to win!
That’s a cute line “Must not be afraid of a little tail.”
Zombieland taught us not to pass up Snoballs cause you don’t know where you’re next Twinkie will come from.
YOUR next twinkie. (It’s Mon.)(Former teacher, must correct my own mistakes.)
Sounds like a fun book!
As for surviving the zombie apocalypse, I’d hang out with my Mormon grandmother. You’re supposed to have a year’s supply of food and other needs if you’re Mormon, so good households have a closet or attic or basement dedicated to food storage. And hey, I’m her granddaughter! She couldn’t turn me away. :D I’ll even bring toilet paper. I think I’m stocked up on that.
sounds like a fun book. great giveaway
The blurb sounds really good! Thanks for the giveaway!
I love zombie books and this is a new one for me! I would love to be entered to win a copy:)
Thank you so much for visiting Jessica!
“What would you do if your neighbors started rising from the dead and attacking?”
I’d grab my shotgun.
LOL I would find a fortifide place to stay with meds, water, food, and plenty of artilery. I’m not dying!!! :) Actually I’d make a run to nearest store with crossbows. I think they totally kick ass in Zombie attacks. NO NOISE!!!
would love to read a new Zombie book! love the cover too.
Toilet paper, cat food and duct tape. Your giving us Texas a bad name…just kidding!
There are so many amazing sounding books out there…and I keep finding more including this one! Thanks for clueing me in!
Thanks for the giveaway! The books sound interesting.
Thanks for the giveaway. I would love to read this book. It sounds really good.
I loved the anecdote: Vampires and doppelgangers need not apply.
Blurb was great!
dsadler53 at yahoo dot ca
I freaking love Jill Myles (Jessica Sims) I have been waiting on this book. If you haven’t read her works as either persona DO immediately. She is such a sweet person also. :)
haha! Loved it. Thank you.
I’m ashamed to admit that I’ve never given much thought to how I would survive a zombie apocalypse. I guess that means I’ll probably go down right away. Maybe it’s time to watch some of those movies. Looking forward to reading Beauty Dates the Beast – it sounds great.
I would love a chance to win. I love your writing!
I guess it’s time to ask the hubby where he hides the key to the gun safe!
This book sounds really good. I love shifters.
OOOOO! Ilona Andrews recommended this one and everything I’ve read that she recommended was fantastic. After reading this article, its going on my “to buy” list right now!
This book has definitely been added to my TBR list! Thanks for the giveaway!
Great post Jessica! :-)
The book sounds fantastic. THanks for the chance to win it!
I’ve seen this book in the bookstore and I would love to get my hands on it. Thanks for the giveaway.
jcalvert719(at)yahoo(dot)com